the smurfs are so much like foster kids
March 23, 2011 at 7:51 am 24 comments
As you all know, I love cartoons. I especially like cartoons when I am feeling down, because they let me drift into other worlds and they make me laugh. The creativity behind a cartoon is just magical. So, yesterday, because I felt crappy and the weather sucked ass, I laid around and watched cartoons with my pets. Sometimes I ju
st watch whatever cartoon comes on without changing the channel, because I figure I can find something comical in them.
So I f
ound this 2-hour marathon of the smurfs. Do you them? They are these little blue creatures, 3 apples high, that live in the forest. There are TONS of them. I don’t know when the smurfs were really first on TV, but they are amazing.
So, as I was watching these little blue creatures run around the woods, I began to think how these smurfs were just like foster kids….Follow me here…
First of all, most people do NOT want to believe they exist. In fact in one episode the human wizard was like “no, no, it can’t be” when confronted by the smurfs. See the similarities?….Most people do not want to believe foster kids exist. They don’t want to have “Their tax dollars spent on someone else’s problem,” or people think “They aren’t my kids. It’s not my problem.” Or worse yet, they ignore the needs of children in care — “no, no, it can’t be!”
Second, there ar
e a few special smurfs that exist and make up the bulk of the show — Papa Smurf, Greedy Smurf, Brainy Smurf, Smurfette, Vanity Smurf, Handy Smurf, Lazy Smurf, Jokey Smurf, — that’s pretty much the main group as far as I can tell. They get the spotlight almost every episode. They are the chosen few, out of TONS of smurfs. My gosh, it’s the same with foster kids…TONS of foster kids in the United States and a select few are chosen for adoption. Thousands age-out without a family, because the select few (young, white, less problems) get all the spotlight.
Third, there is one Papa Smurf for tons of other smurfs. Do you know how many times I stayed in a foster home that was packed with kids? Illegally overpacked based on the laws regarding # of kids and beds in a room. Stuff us in…one set of foster parents for lots of foster kids.
Fourth, and this similarity is extremely personal, but true for many foster kids as well…. where the fuck is MAMA SMURF? She is probably getting high off the magic smurfy mushrooms or whoring around smurf village and abandoned all t
he little smurfs.
Fifth, there are lots of little houses in the smurf village, just like many group home settings. Some smurfs have their own house and some share a house. This is like living in a fucking group home. Some of the grou
p homes I lived in were big “campuses” that had different “houses,” spread about. They were either named after someone like the LT home and the KC home; or just named like girls 10-14, girls 15-17, etc. It sucked. Lots of houses…just like the smurfs.
Sixth, smurfs run away from the smurf village when they get upset, just like foster kids run a
way. The smurfs hide in the woods. The other smurfs go out and search for the run-away smurfs to bring them home. Many foster kids run away from their foster homes. Within 8-12 hours, depending on your state you are considered a “runner” and the police start looking for you.
Seventh..the smurfs don’t have many clothes; in fact they wear the same dam thing every episode. Many foster kids have limited clothing; especially if living in a bad home, where “you have to wait for the check to get a new pair of sneakers” even though your toes are sticking out from all sides… Or sometimes you move and leave all your stuff behind, including clothes. ...it’s not very smurfy to be dressed in uncomfortable clothing or to not have at least a couple outfits to your name.
And lastly, and a real important element…smurfs are stunted in their development, just like fost er kids. They never grow. Kids in foster care if NOT provided with love and guidance and safety and stability do not grow into productive, healthy adults. Look at me…I am still a child developmentally in many ways; as well as stunted educationally, emotionally, and spiritually. Stunted in foster care…
As the 2-hour marathon ended, I turned off the TV and looked to see if I had turned blue…my skin had not turned blue, but I felt more “blue” — thinking that something as wonderful as a creative and innocent cartoon could cause me to think about my life in foster care. I look forward to the day when that no longer happens…
Entry filed under: Uncategorized. Tags: child protective services, CPS, Foster Care, foster children, foster homes, foster kids, foster parents, group homes, papa smurf, runaway foster kids, smurfs, social workers.
1.
Lisa | March 23, 2011 at 9:11 am
Smurfs were really popular in the early 80′s I believe. I have never made the analogy of Smurfs being like foster kids, but you make good points.
I did foster care and adopted for 13 years. We all knew who the “bad” foster homes were and I’m sure the workers did too. They left them open because they were the ones who took ANY kid – no matter how severe the behaviors and that’s all anyone cared about. As long as they didn’t leave marks and didn’t lose any of the kids, I think they turned a blind eye to the ill-fitting clothing, dirty homes and poor nutrition. I busted my butt to make sure my foster children had ALL the opportunities that my bio and adopted children had. I went to their school conferences and plays. They played baseball and soccer, they took dance lessons, had birthday parties. They were all MINE as long as they were under my roof (and I miss every single one of those that went home and have grown up in those dysfunctional families that were so much better than what I had to offer) – something I was constantly reminded not to think by the workers. Yes, they had bio parents – some had ones that actually loved them in their own way, but none had bio parents who would put them first and cherish them. It breaks my heart to hear how hard your life must have been. I just found your blog and haven’t even read most of your posts yet and still, I wish you’d been here. I am sorry, which I completely understand is little consolation to you at this point.
You are valuable, you have a purpose in this life and you are LOVED.
2.
Joe | March 23, 2011 at 3:11 pm
Lisa,
I gotta think there would be a lot more blogs by struggling, aged out foster kids if it weren’t for the good work done by you and many other foster homes who are doing things right. Thanks to you and those like you! May there be many who follow in your footsteps.
Unfortunately, there are also tons of kids who are just as messed up by the system but don’t have the courage to post their struggles publicly on the internet. So very glad to have LT and her blog where ignorant people like me can learn from, rejoice with, and join forces with to hopefully change a broken system.
Joe
3.
Ann | March 23, 2011 at 9:22 am
I think this “I look forward to the day when that no longer happens…” is a sign that things are slowly changing for you. So I’m glad.
4.
Jen | March 23, 2011 at 10:39 am
We watched that when I was little. I can totally hear the theme song in my head now. La, la, la-la-la-la….
5.
The Sleeper | March 23, 2011 at 11:04 am
Number 4, although sad cracked me up…because where is Mama Smurf? LT, you are so creative. This was an awesome analogy and once again filled with important points. I am not sure whether I should be laughing hysterically or crying. Thank you.
6.
Laurke | March 23, 2011 at 12:01 pm
my thoughts exactly
Where is the mama in all the cartoons, Disney movies, etc??? The Princess and the Frog was the only one with a good mama in it that I can recall.
7.
hazy55 | March 23, 2011 at 11:23 am
I watched those as a child. I hear a movie is coming out about them. I agree with Ann and The Sleeper. So creative LT and moving forward positively. I enjoyed the trip down memory lane.
Awesome comparisons
8.
michelle v | March 23, 2011 at 11:34 am
you probably will always see the connection b/c you’re intuitive and sensitive which is a good thing, but it will come to a point where it won’t be so overwhelming.
how’s the journalling going. you’ll have so much to share with dr val.
have u seen this adoption initiative?
http://www.focusonthefamily.com/about_us/news_room/news-releases/20100329-wait-no-more-adoption-ohio.aspx
very cool
♥ michelle
9.
Loreley | March 23, 2011 at 11:46 am
I love the smurfs. (did not know they were called smurfs in english). They were very big in the late 70ies and 80ies.
But honestly it never occurred to me that they had so many common points with foster kids. You have good points there.
By the way: do you know the borribles? they are little creatures living in the canal system…
10.
nanci | March 23, 2011 at 12:02 pm
oh my. Another great one. ROTFLMAO. You should write a book on your analogies alone. Oh jesus, love the point about Papa and Mama smurf and about the select few smurfs. Now that song will be in my head all day. LOL
11.
Crumble | March 23, 2011 at 12:02 pm
LT,
You really are a gifted writer! I echo The Sleeper’s comments – lol.
You always make such valid points. I am so sorry that the foster system is so screwed.
And you are right, “it’s not very smurfy to be dressed in uncomfortable clothing or to not have at least a couple outfits to your name.”. I love the way you worded this – very whitty, yet heartbreaking.
LT, you really have brought more understanding to so many readers. I am so thankful for how you have impacted my life.
Have a Smurfy day!
12.
Ashley | March 23, 2011 at 12:12 pm
LT, I’ve been reading off and on for awhile, but I haven’t known what to say… Today I do! You’re doing it, girlfriend! You’re surviving and *thinking* and making it, even though Dr. Val is on vacation. She will be so proud of you…. I know i am! And I will never look at the Smurfs the same way again.
13.
butterflysblog | March 23, 2011 at 3:02 pm
Sweet LT – you are so thoughtful and brilliant.
Fucking Gargamel, and all the other humans who are that stupid.
14.
Fi | March 23, 2011 at 8:58 pm
Nice analogy. Nice way to spend some down time!
15.
Rose | March 23, 2011 at 9:16 pm
I think your points are great. I think your creativity is great. I think you will make it because you are beginning to see some positiveness in life. I love these analogies, because they help with perspective so much. Thanks LT. Hang in there, Dr. Val will be back shortly.
16.
bethanylest | March 23, 2011 at 9:57 pm
Hi. Someone sent your blog to me today. I just started reading it, but wanted to ask if I can use some of your entries in foster parent training classes. They will be very helpful. Please email me at bethanylest@yahoo.com when you get chance. You are truly amazing and your voice is very powerful. I hope that you find some happiness in your life. Thank you so much.
17.
rene wallis | March 24, 2011 at 10:09 am
You are smart. And funny.
Even in the midst of a tough day, you looked at life humour.
Now, I have to watch the smurfs.
18.
Foster Mom in Training | July 6, 2011 at 1:57 am
I grew up watching the Smurfs. Thank you for making that connection to foster care as I would not have seen it otherwise.
19.
kerri hankin | September 26, 2011 at 12:12 pm
you are freaking brilliant.
20.
Ella | September 28, 2011 at 4:26 pm
Wait a minute. The smurf with spotlight, what do you mean? They only display the ones that they like?
21.
Rita Brennan Freay | October 4, 2011 at 11:24 am
I just stumbled upon this…I love smurfs! Always have…still have one from when I was a kid…you are too funny and sadly, right! I love that you can see humor in things. You are a brilliant writer…your voice needs to be heard, loud and clear…as you have so much to offer and the ability to help so many others! I will never look at smurfs the same way, but I will always love them!!! Take care.
Rita Brennan Freay
@Rita4kids
http://ritabrennanfreay.com
22.
fostercareandkinshipcare | March 21, 2012 at 4:34 am
I enjoyed this post and have shared it on our facebook page:
http://www.facebook.com/FosterCareSupport
All the best.
Diane
http://www.fostercaresupport.org.au
23.
Silverflamerider | April 30, 2012 at 8:42 pm
LT, I know you’re not me, but you get me. It’s like you reached in my brain and touched the dark goo from FC. You make it easier to find humour when I feel like jumping off a bridge. Keep it up, your words bring much needed solace.
24.
michael | December 4, 2012 at 9:26 am
I was in foster care. I got treated horribly and bounced around like a piece of garbage. Also, regardless of how intelligent I was or how bad I wanted it I was put in classes for handicap kids even though I’m a perfectly normal guy with a decent ammount of brains. I don’t even look retarded at all. I’m actually a very handsome guy. No one cared or paid attention to my problems and I was not allowed to get a job and when I turned 18 they threw my stuff outside, literally, and made me leave. The state even sent my therapy sessions to creditors from when I was a minor in the foster system. They spent so much time telling me what was wrong with me I never figured out what I good about me until many years later. They did not help me. None of them. They fucked up my life and cast me out in the cold with skills I had learned on my own with no help. The foster care system is pure garbage.