Coupons for Kids in Foster Care
Today I was watching this show on TV about people who collect tons of coupons and buy so much stuff, it is almost ridiculous. In this show, the people get hundreds or thousands of dollars worth of items at the store, but only pay like $10 because they use coupons. I didn’t quite get why the people wanted to store 100 jars of mayonaise and 500 toothbrushes, instead of donating some of it to soup kitchens or shelters…
As I watched this, I thought of a series of coupons that ALL foster kids need while being stuck in foster care…
1) Dump a Worker
This coupon entitles foster kids to dump workers that suck. Those that are non-responsive, disappear, lie, are burnt-out, and don’t care. This card can be used multiple times, especially since the longer a kid is in care, the greater the risk of getting workers that suck.
Workers that don’t return calls… use the coupon. Workers that don’t do required visits… use the coupon. Workers that do not follow through with things they promised …use the coupon. Wouldn’t it be interesting to record how many coupons kids use on each worker? Geez, that could tell alot…
2) It Didn’t Happen
Since so many foster/adoptive parents are focused on a child’s behaviors, this coupon entitles foster kids to make a “mistake” that will be ignored. Instead of yelling, punishing, or spreading negative energy at your child, completely ignore the “mistake.” In instances where behaviors are truly inappropriate and corrective action is needed, this coupon could be a reminder to use creativity and methods that force “togetherness” instead of separation. Foster children should be given a new coupon each new foster home and perhaps even a few to get through the first weeks in a new foster home…
3) Dinner of Your Choice
This coupon allows foster kids to choose dinner for a night. What a great way to make foster kids feel welcome and accepted! When a child comes to a new home, frequently he/she is required to get used to the “new family’s” food. This coupon requires the “new family” to try the foster child’s favorites.
This coupon can be used to STOP bad foster parents from hurting foster kids. It almost has “magic” coupon powers, as pulling out the coupon automatically stops abuse.
5) Free Advice
If you are a regular reader of my blog, you know I often ask for advice about “life things.” Growing up, I never had the stability or trust in people that I could ask questions or ask advice. This coupon entitles foster kids to get advice when needed. Ideally there should be a 24-hour advice line that foster children have access to contact, if they did not feel secure enough to ask the other people in their lives… Advice kids mostly need probably focuses on body development and image, sex, school work, and bio-family issues.
This coupon is like a “get out of jail free” card, except that it applies to foster homes. Foster kids can use this card to get out of foster homes that suck. Foster homes suck for a variety of reasons: abuse, neglect, foster parents who shame children, foster parents that are not interested in a child, foster parents who speak badly about the foster child or the biological family, foster parents who do not “click” with the child, etc. This coupon can be used to choose to move.
7) Avoid an Ass-Kicking
Every foster kid who gets the luck of winding up in a group home or RTC needs this coupon. Don’t fool yourselves into thinking that these places are safe, they are not. I have written about fuck closets and bathroom beatings before. Newbies watch out! Younger kids watch out! If you have something others want, watch out! This coupon is used to avoid ass-kicking, either from a group home/RTC or in a foster home. Every time a child goes to a new foster home or a new group home or RTC, this coupon needs to be given.
8) Forever Family
For every kid in foster care… so they never have to feel like me…