May is National Foster Care Month? …Do you CARE?
Foster Care defined: (from dictionary.com)
The raising or supervision of foster children, as orphans or delinquents, in an institution, group home, or private home, usually arranged through a government or social-service agency that provides remuneration for expenses.
Nice definition eh? I fucking hate it.
Can you guess why?
I can hear some readers telling me this definition is fabulous…. covers all the basics. Check.
I can hear one reader who used to tell me to eat more green veggies, that she is a DAM good foster parent and the definition is fine. 🙂
I can hear other readers yelling at me telling me that this definition sucks because it does…. it sucks.
Let’s be real for a few moments while you are reading….
First problem — RAISING???
Raise = lift or move to a higher position or level
I spent years in foster care and wasn’t moved to a higher position or level. In fact, many times I was in similar situations as I was in my bio-home….just with different people. Abuse doesn’t stop in foster care nor group homes. How many kids do you know that were abused in foster care? Me, …. and thousands of others. Raised? No.
Foster care kicked my ass out on the street when I turned 18? Was that RAISING me to a higher level? Crap, I was homeless with nothing. Thousands of kids age-out every year…. I bet those kids aren’t at a higher level… especially those on the streets or back to their bioparents or dead.
I RAISED myself. Yes, there were a couple good foster families (Hippies, Ms. Liz), but I wasn’t there long enough to be RAISED. Any position of higherness that I got was mostly because of me… and trust me… The only HIGH I got was from smoking weed. I am not higher at all… I struggle like most everyone, but without a family and all kinds of fucked up mental problems. I still need a family, damit!
Second – “ARRANGED?”
Arrange = put (things) in a neat, attractive, or required order
Arrange = organize or make plans for (a future event)
bahahahahahaha….. ARRANGED? How many times were workers scrambling to “find” a place to put me? Arrange? Plans for the future? Comon’ — there is nothing like sitting in a workers office while they frantically call looking for a placement for you. Good planning. Oh and thanks for the McDonalds… I still heard what you were saying on that phone!
There is no plans for the future. Long term foster kids live in the moment. Even planning for our futures is a joke. I have written about my permanency hearings where it was always adoption… no other plan. Fuck that. You know barely anyone over the age of 8 gets adopted. How about: A FUTURE that doesnt include getting kicked out on the streets? How about: A FUTURE with an education? How about: A FUTURE with a support system of people who care about me?
Flowers are more arranged than the foster care system. LOL.
Third = ORPHANS OR DELIQUIENTS?
Is that the only choices? Orphan means no bioparents. Deliquients means…well, I won’t go there. How about acknowledging the other posibilities: in foster care because of: abusive parents, drug-addicted parents, alcoholic parents, deadbeat parents, parents in jail, hooker parents, ….THE LIST COULD GO ON. But, noooooooooooo, just ignore the role that bioparents have in why the fuck we were/are in foster care. I sure as hell didn’t choose to be there and it sure as hell wasn’t my fault I was there (although I blame myself still).
I can’t go on wasting my time. This definition sucks.… as much as foster care sucks.
May is National Foster Care month….
Do you think anyone cares?
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