danger at the dentist
So…i HATE the dentist. I have only been a few times in my life, but it freaked me out beyond belief. I felt confined and hated people that close to me ~ e.g. get OUT of my personal space. I felt totally trapped having to lay back in the chair. Hated all the stuff in my mouth. I only went to the dentist when something got really bad. The last time i was at the dentist, I needed a root canal. The dentist told me that most people could not have dealt with the pain from my tooth. We all know that i have a high tolerance for pain and the only reason i went was because it was starting to actually hurt me and my street tricks (cloves and whiskey) were not working.
Well this time i went to a lady dentist because my one tooth is hurting. I was freaking out, but I managed to get in the chair and have the exam. I spaced out and don’t remember the exam at all, but I remember talking to the dentist…..
DENTIST: You have 16 cavities in your mouth. You have 2 baby teeth still in your mouth. <She looked at me.>
DENTIST: You need to come back. But we have to do this in steps because you get nervous in the chair. We will start with the front teeth. When was the last time you went to the dentist? Do you smoke? Are you bulimeic?
ME: Ah….ah…. it was like years ago. I had a root canal on one tooth then. I get nervous at the dentist.
DENTIST: Did you have a bad experience at the dentist?
ME: Um, no, I’ve only been to the dentist like 2-3 times. I try to take care of things with stuff like cloves. I think there are other reasons people might get nervous at the dentist.
DENTIST: Yes there are other reasons people are fearful of the dentist. Many people don’t like to have people that close to them, you know? When you come back, we will give you nitrous oxide to help you calm down. Do you smoke? Are you bulimeic?
DENTIST: Very good that you stopped smoking. Nitrous oxide, a gas that will help…
ME: I know what it is….<thinking about laughing gas>… just never knew it was at THE dentist…
DENTIST: It helps for me to do the work when you are more relaxed… you need alot of work. Your enamel is in bad shape. I suggest you use a prescription toothpaste and brush after eating and drinking… Acid from soda, tea, some juices, or from stomach acid if you are bulemic will destroy your teeth…
ME: Will my insurance pay for this? <Me showing the card>
DENTIST: It will pay part of it. You will have to call to find out how much. I will give you a sample of toothpaste. Try to use it. If your mouth gets dry, instead of drinking soda, try water or use a gel to moisten you mouth. Ok? When you come back, we have to do a few more x-rays of specific teeth.. Don’t forget to come back…ok?
Fucking 16 cavities… how is that possible?
I left the dentist with a bag including a purple toothbrush, samples of toothpaste, samples of gel that helps keep your mouth moist, a bottle of cold water, and another appointment to fix my teeth this week. I have to have like 7-9 appointments. That sucks.
Do I really need to get all 16 cavities done?
I don’t take care of my teeth. That’s the truth. Since I was young, it was never reinforced as a “self-care” habit and I feel like that lesson got lost. I forget to brush them alot, I drink too much soda, I puke up food, I forget to use dental floss. I ignore any pain that comes from my teeth. And I don’t goto the dentist. Another failure at self-care…Do you know that I took better care of Moonlight and Harbor’s teeth than I do mine? They had teeth cleaning at the vets office a few times during their lives…….I cared about them…I don’t care about me.
What a mess….
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